It's Never Easy

June 5th, 2011

I have people say all the time to me, “I don’t know how you do it.”  You know, referring to having a bunch of kids and …. (fill in the blank: going grocery shopping, playing at a playland, homeschooling, keeping my sanity).

And usually now I just smile and tell them they could do it too.  Because really though it feels like it’s gotten easier, not harder having more kids, I think the real answer is that I’ve simply adjusted.  Therefore, I know for a fact you could adjust just as well as I have.  Really, I promise.

Saturday morning we got up at the crack of dawn (which is nothing new), I served the kids hot dogs before 7am, Matt brewed us some coffee and we hit the road.  A garage sale, the Farmer’s Market, a park, Blue Coast burrito divided between Matt and me on the road, Chick-fil-A playland for the kids, another garage sale, and home to grill and play in the pool.  Sounds idyllic, right?  I know I used to think, “How do people do it?  They talk about doing all these things with their kids, but when we try it somebody always pees their pants.”

And you know what?  Somebody always does.

Today’s trip to town brought with it a poopy diaper and a discovery that I left the wet wipes out of my bag.  I looked around my dirty I-Spy van (which comes in quite handy; you thought it was just laziness when really it’s a survival skill I’ve developed), I found some napkins and a bottle of water.  Knowing that the napkins would disintegrate if I poured the water directly on them before wiping aforementioned dirty bottom, I left the diaper under his little bottom, poured the water on that cute little booty and then wiped.  Rinse and repeat.  It wasn’t a show-stopper.  Nobody cried or flipped out or even cussed.  Nothing was bought to fix the problem.  Just a little resourcefulness and a “go on about our rat killin’”.

There were other issues, somebody spilled the hand cleaner, there were 2 potty emergencies, there was an unplanned side of the road nursing session (yes, for the toddler, that’s how we roll), the van started making a new noise, we got to the burrito place 15 minutes early and had to drive around to kill time, and other varied and sundry issues.

But such is life with kids.  Embrace it, don’t fight it.

The days that go well, I’ve noticed are the days I roll.  Not the days I feel entitled to things going smoothly.  Not the days I dig in my heels and grit my teeth.

That’s how I do it.  No secrets.  Having 5 kids, being an attachment parent, homeschooling, staying home and consequently choosing way less money.  It’s all hard.  If there’s any secret it’s this: It’s never easy.  Not having one child, not having 15.  Not homeschooling, not public schooling.  It’s all hard.  Breastfeeding, formula feeding.  Staying home, working.  It’s all hard.  Life is hard.  I just pick the things that work best for us.  I choose the things I like most, I don’t let much scare me off.  And I’m learning to roll with the punches.